“That was long,” he says, slipping his fingers between mine.

“It was,” I agree, squeezing his hand, noting the slight of his cheeks, the sure of his step, the big in my boy.

“Was it fun?” I ask with mothering words, leading the conversation my way.

He squints into my question. A cyclist speeds, a dog barks, a bird lands. “No,” he finally answers. He turns his head from side to side, sure of his answer.

We’re walking from his sister’s school talent show. I was so proud of the 7 year olds taking the “stage” with songs and poems, hoola hoops and jump ropes. I cheered for them with crossed fingers that they’ll hold onto that unabashed Look at me for as long as possible.

So it was fun, for me as a mom of one of those 7 year olds.

But when you’re 4 and you go to a lot of events and activities that aren’t your own, “not fun” is probably a pretty good description of how it was.

Before I have the chance to flex and smooth and mother this moment, his fingers release mine and he runs.

Bright sun and hot wind frame his quickness and far ahead, I see him drop. Knees to ground, toes tipped, he sits at the edge where the newly greened grass meets the sidewalk.

He slips off his baseball cap and starts filling it with dandelions, plucking them one by one until his hat is overflowing with sunshine, and fun.

His face lights, his voice travels. There’s no need to quiet either one so I ask, “Want to paint with those?”

His cheeks raise, “That’s fun.” He affirms. I couldn’t possibly agree more.

How to Paint with Dandelions

• Pick dandelions, leaving enough stem for little hands to hold
• Pour colorful paint onto a paper plate (or if your paint bottles are wide enough, you can skip this step and dip right into them)
• Use your dandelions as stamps, dipping them into paint and then onto paper
• Let your little one experiment with repeated stamps before “reloading” a dandelion, the stamps look different depending how much paint is on them
• We use a different dandelion for each paint color
• This also looks lovely with black paint on white paper or white paint on black paper
• When the masterpiece is complete, let it dry and consider framing it – holding onto your golden moment a titch longer.

Phil’s hit that point in his young life when every now and then he has a scary bedtime experience.

It’s not every night, but he’s started to talk about nightmares and bad dreams when he has them. And it’s my job as the muhmuh to help get him past that.

So recently, when he woke up yelling about the swarm of imaginary bees in his bed, the wheels started turning. We had talked about bugs a few days earlier, and what made them bugs.

I spoke to him calmly, making sure I sounded interested but not worried about this problem that felt very real to him. I asked him if bees were bugs. We talked about how they had six legs, and different sections to their bodies, and yup. They’re bugs.

I asked him if the bug spray we put on before going outside would work on his bed to keep the bees away.

I could see a little light bulb turn on in his mind – “YES!” He said.

Forget that this doesn’t really work in real life. Bees are just to crafty for me. But let’s imagine bug spray works on imaginary bees!

So before bed last night, we took a spray bottle of mild smelling, kid friendly bug spray into his room. We spritzed it here and there lightly, and then spritzed a tiny bit of it around his bed.

For good measure, we made a sign for the door with big bold letters that read, “NO BEES”. Just in case a bee flew up that couldn’t read, we also drew a picture of a bee and a circle with a line through it. You want to make sure all your bases are covered when it comes to a scary bedtime!

Most kids don’t have bee nightmares at bedtime, though – we’ve found monsters are a more common culprit when it comes to bedtime fears. Did you know it’s super easy to make homemade Monster Repellent?

Monster Repellent

You’ll need:

• Empty spray bottle
• Water
• 1-2 drops of essential oil

This monster repellent is so easy to make! You can get a spray bottle for a buck at the local dollar store. Fill it up with water, add a couple of drops of fragrance. Put the top on and shake it up, and you’re good to go!

If you don’t have any essential oil handy, get creative – what do you have around your house that smells good? A couple of drops of orange juice? Maybe a sprig of rosemary from your garden? Look around, you’ll find something. Just remember you want to go easy on your scent addition – when you spray this in your house, will it stain something or make it sticky?

Extra points if you give your spray bottle an official looking label. Print out the one below, have your child color it. Then just cut it out, and tape it on your bottle.

Make sure to put this spray bottle somewhere handy so you can eradicate any pesky monsters at a moment’s notice!

I love this craft so much. Make special occasions even brighter with our confetti-covered party hat! Celebrate the birthday kid in style with a special hat just for them, or set up stations so every party goer can create their own style. Don’t forget to take lots of  pictures when you’re done!

What you will need:

Paper mache cones (we like these)

Confetti circles (buy them pre-cut or create your own with scissors and tissue paper)

Paintbrush

Craft glue

Grosgrain ribbon (1″ to 2″ widths work best)

Scissors

Jumbo-sized pom poms (for the finishing touch!)

Step 1: 

Starting at the bottom of your cone, paint a thin layer of glue and apply confetti circles one at a time, overlapping the edges. Work your way up the cone, making sure to cover all empty spaces.

Step 2:

Poke two holes opposite each other at the base of the cone.

Knot lengths of ribbon (approximately 8″, or measure each child for an exact fit) through each hole. These will tie beneath the child’s chin to keep the finished hat in place.

Step 3:

Glue a pom pom to the very top. You’re ready to celebrate!

–Soleil

         Marvelous mom always here

Over the top awesome

       Talks to me when I am sad

Hears everything I say
         Everything she does is great

Raining with kindness

Mothers Day

Sunday, May 12, 2013

10:57pm

Today is Mothers Day… I got breakfast in bed, a plethora of homemade gifts & cards & flowers adorn our home. The “Mother” defined at top of this page by my 8 year old was one of the many cards filled with heartfelt words that brought me to tears.

She had me at “always here.”

It erased for a minute the countless times I have heard, “You always work,” “You are going out again?” “You pick me up…” The countless times my Jewish guilt has taken over.

“Hears everything I say.” These are the words that opened the floodgates. I have been working so hard on listening to my kids, my husband, et al… it feels so good that she noticed.

I want to brand these words on my brain. I want to make a million copies and hand it to my girls when they are telling me, “I am the meanest mommy ever…”They asked me so many times today, “when is children’s day?”

My answer always the same, “Everyday!”

My daughter said, “Every day is Mothers Day!”

So true, once a mother, always a mother… 365 days a year… all day, every day and I do feel truly blessed to be a mom to these three amazing beings. I say it often, it’s the hardest thing I have ever done and at times I question my sanity.  However, it is always the challenges that bring the greatest rewards.

Even today, on this holy day…  I found myself bribing and bargaining and using “Mothers Day” to my advantage. If I had a dollar for every time I said, “remember it’s Mothers Day…” at the sign of discord, a raised voice, to get something I wanted, I would be rich! Wish I had a phrase that worked so well everyday… and trust me I have tried many.

When I woke up at 6:45 am to three little girls bearing gifts and coffee and my words escaped before I could stop them, “let me sleep in…” I quickly gathered my senses and the words of Alice Walker came to me as my eyes finally opened and I saw my girls’ faces.

“Yes, Mother. I can see you are flawed. You have not hidden it. That is your greatest gift to me.” – Alice Walker

Originally posted at Kimberly Muller Words…

Photo credit

This has been a stressful year. My husband and I have both been dealing with issues related to our aging parents. My father’s situation has been the most dramatic. But while supporting me and being my rock, my husband has had his own concerns and crises to deal with.

On top of that, we are parents of a bright, spirited four year-old girl. Who has been experiencing health problems. I am home full time with her. He is dealing with a new, long commute (his office recently moved farther from our home).

For our anniversary in February, I purchased a couple’s package from a local spa. With all the craziness going on, we only recently had the opportunity to enjoy it.

Years ago, when we were first dating, I took my husband to get a pedicure with me. He was resistant, saying, “Men don’t do that sort of thing.”

I retorted with, “Well, they certainly should!” And off we went. He loved it, and we have enjoyed more pedicures together since. This time, he was experiencing his first facial.

“What are they going to be doing to me?” he asked warily.

“It’s kind of like getting your teeth cleaned,” the esthetician replied cheerily.

Not an analogy I would have used.

But he did enjoy it, as did I, along with a much-needed massage for both of us. After which we sat in our spa robes sipping mimosas, eating lunch and talking. Not about our child. Or our parents. Or any of the stresses we’ve been dealing with. Just talking.

It was delightful. And I realized my husband and I are not taking enough time to care for ourselves – individually or as a couple. We need to start making it a priority.

Our situation is in no way unique. Everyone has stress. It is part of life. But if you don’t find ways to deal with it, stress will get the better of you.

A day at the spa will probably not be a regular thing. Fortunately, there are many other ways to remove ourselves from the craziness of life and reconnect with each other. And I am going to make sure we do.

What are some of the things to you do to take time for yourself and your relationship with your partner?

Spring is finally upon us and in addition to spring cleaning this year, we have been in a huge home improvement kick; repainting, organizing, and landscaping.

One of the projects I wanted to take on was painting our front door. Though I’m normally not a decorating risk taker, I had really been wanting a yellow front door.

I’d been coveting a yellow door ever since I saw a magazine picture floating around on Pinterest.

After doing a lot of research, I discovered that the color shown in the photograph was Farrow and Ball’s Dayroom Yellow. At $105 a gallon, I decided to find a more affordable option. Benjamin Moore’s Hawthorne Yellow is also a light yellow with a slight gray undertone, which goes well with our white trim and light blue steps and shutters.

To be even more cost efficient, I went to Lowe’s and asked them to color match Benjamin Moore’s Hawthorne Yellow. Because the paint would be for the exterior of the front door, I choose Valspar’s Duramax Paint and Primer. We got a quart for around $15.

Our front door was originally a light shade of green, which was fine, but there was no “pop.” I got excited and forgot to take a “before” picture before I painted on a sample color!

The first step was to cover the floor with a paint drop sheet and remove the door hardware. This project takes a full day, so plan to stay home and start in the morning. It’s also very helpful to have a toddler helper!

We applied four light and even coats. We also replaced the old gold doorknobs with new silver ones. I love the way the yellow brightens up the porch and pops against our bluish/gray and white siding. Looking at it from the driveway, I feel like it always should have been yellow. It just seems to fit.

The key to successfully painting a front door is allowing yourself a full day and doing it in light, even coats. We did four, but if you were using a darker color you might be able to get away with three. We made sure to let each coat fully dry before we applied the next one.

What do you think? Would you go for a bolder color for spring on your front door?

Population 13 and 1/2.  We read about it and made plans to come out here about ten years ago. But then Ilse saved a friend’s home, single handedly putting out a blazing pile of drywall before the fire trucks arrived, and got pneumonia for her efforts. As we pull out of the fields and giant hill stones of the surrounding lost countryside, we’re wondering how it ever took us so long to finally find this fantastic hideaway.

Benton Hot Springs is a ghost town with one bed and breakfast left to its name. Each little cowboy room has it’s own hot tub out back and behind that there’s ten camp sites, each with their own hot tub as well.

We scored site #4 and its small wooden wine cask tub with a bit of privacy and a ton of character. The tub has two spigots. The hot one lets water in directly from the little steamy stream running by. The cold one let’s you make the mighty hot water just perfect and then there’s a hose you can screw on that connects to a contraption of lawn sprinklers above you. There’s nothing more amazing that sitting in very hot water with cold rain pouring down on you as you gaze up at snow frosted peaks and the constellations above.

We spent the next morning idly strolling around the ghost town, reading the headstones of the old grave yard, hopping the almost boiling streams up near the source, and going out, hay in hand, to meet the buffalos in the pasture.

Benton is only a tank of gas away from LA up the 395. Bishop, the last town before you cut off onto HWY 6, is a funky cowboy town that begs strolling along its raised sidewalks and peeking down it’s antique alleys.

The real treat though is missed by everyone who goes booming past to Mammoth. Five minutes up HWY 6 from Bishop is one of the coolest and largest historical museums in California.

The Laws Railroad Museum is reconstituted wild west town. Each building and house is a reliquary of tidbits left by the generations that peopled and prospered and have largely disappeared from the Owens River Valley.

There’s the chemist and the dentist, the ophthalmologist, the branding foundry with a siamese lamb under glass and the everything-in-reverse printer’s shop. All the hand tools of early industry and medicine, some gruesome, are on quiet and forgotten display. You can go into the school house and the bar, ring the bell or tink the piano, and there’s a quint family home with modern conveniences like a proto-refridgerator and early mechanical washing machine. There’s gems and arrowheads galore housed across the way from the post office whose walls are lined with wanted posters and a camera shop with all the boon of film’s lost glory. The spine of the town is a giant steam engine to be climbed over and through and then, shoved forward by it’s Minotaurian head, a FOAMER’s freak-out room full of all things train.

We drove across America last summer but are so often reminded that some of the coolest road trips are right in our LA backyard. We want to go back up there soon and keep driving the 6 as it bears east and meanders through the empty middle belly of Nevada. It’s the spaceship on vacation way to get to Vegas.